Thursday, April 26, 2007

the man rocks!

item 1:

i love food. and free stuff. therefore, i am in favor of imagined corporate "holidays" to celebrate people like me, as it can involve both of these joys.

item 2:

i work for the man. yes, big brother, the gob'ment, dr. evil...take your pick. some days, i wonder what happened to my bohemian ambitions of joining the peace corp & not slaving away 40 hours a week for the man. and yet, here i sit, totally subservient to the man, wasting away 40 hours a week in an office, wishing i was someplace warmer, perhaps, or at least somewhere i could run around barefoot.


synthesis:

wednesday was "administrative professionals day," which is pretty much an overinflated secretary's day. i am a secretary. the man has a day celebrating...me? huh. and what did the man see fit to give me? a free lunch at olive garden, where i partook of the stuffed chicken marsala & italian cream cake, and an american express gift card.

huh.

i'm tempted to like the man now. after all, the man does pay me pretty well, gives me great health & dental benefits, and lets me have a 3-day weekend...every week. he pays me on holidays, allows me to have power over people, and lets me spend his money...regularly.

in the words of david cassidy, i think i love you, the man.

rock on, pal. rock. on.

Monday, April 23, 2007

the prodigal son has returned!

ahem.

i have an announcement to make, one that may shock some, frighten others, or just make you say, "huh."

after 7 & 1/2 years abstaining from mammal flesh, i have broken that line...with a chicken green chile quesadilla from bajio. yes, the rumors are true! (and quite a good fleetwood mac album, too.) i am now an omnivore. i now regularly tear apart the flesh of mammals with my bare claws & consume the carcases of caribou until i haved been filled to capacity and can lie for the rest of the day in under the sub-saharan sun napping...

oh, wait. that's not me. that's a lion...

but, really. i do eat meat regularly now...sort of. i've started with chicken & have stayed there. i'm not ready to eat red meat, yet. the lion in me has not been awakened yet.

so go ahead with your petty comments & accusative questions...all you need to know is that this was my decision, it's been a year or so in the making, & my family has welcomed me back with open, meat-filled hands!

nama [on phone]: dad, i have an annoucement to make...i had chicken for dinner tonight.
nama's dad: well, so did i....

Wednesday, April 18, 2007

"no eating here tonight!"

i feel like i'm on a diet...but i'm not. so how else am i to explain my day-to-day eating habits as of late (& i'm not including this past weekend's indulgences of cafe rio & mimi's cafe...or the free ice cream i got at ben & jerry's last night (but, even then, i didn't eat it all!))?

here's an accounting of what i injest during a typical work day:

breakfast: dry cereal, either plain cheerios or whole wheat chex

second breakfast: a fuji apple, sliced into 1/8ths

lunch: a lean cuisine meal. (i'm particulary fond of the the pizzas.)

afternoon snack: chocolate (well, this doesn't really fit either, but come on! every girl's got to have their chocolate!)

dinner: cold cereal, cheese stick, oj or some other mix/variety of juice, occasional breakfasty items, such as eggs or whole wheat waffles, or whole wheat pasta & tomato sauce.

what's wrong with me?! i'm now that kind of girl! i've never been on a diet, and yet, in my 25th year, i subconsciously feel the need to? holy freud! can somebody please explain this phenomenon to me?

and now, if you'll excuse me, i am going to finish off my bag of cheerios, a' la little-kid-in-church. munch

Monday, April 09, 2007

i don't do stuff

on saturday, i did something i thought i'd never do ...i hiked the 'Y'.

yes, i've lived here for over 3 & 1/2 years now and have been a graduate for nearly a year, but no, i have never hiked the 'Y' until two days ago. since i'm not a big hiker, i was reassured that this particular hike would be easy and that my gramma could make it, and the fact that i also hiked most of stuart falls about a month ago also bolstered my confidence that i could, indeed, not only hike the 'Y', but kick trash at the same time. however, i found myself, instead, being painfully reminded of how out-of-shape i am.

oh how the mighty fall so quickly and with so much whining...

i was dying by the 4th switchback, having to stop frequently to catch my breath and try to not die. by the time number 6 came around, i was told that i was only half way there. i was no longer having fun. i was starting to get fiesty. and i wanted to sit and whine.

but, fortunately, i had someone there to push me along, knowing that i could do this. i pushed, went a bit slower, and by the time we reached the 10th switchback, i felt triumphant (well, triumphant in the sense that, even though i felt like a wuss, i still pushed on, continuing to feel like a wuss, but a wuss who wouldn't quit, dang it!), and given the option of hiking up 2 more switchbacks to the top of the 'Y' as opposed to the bottom, i decided i could do it. i pushed myself a little further, and i made it! i do have the heart of a champion!

and now all i have to show for it are sore quads, gluts, and ankles. and a desire to never, ever hike the 'Y' again.

Tuesday, April 03, 2007

wasting away in stark-white-officeville

i wish i were here...














but instead, i'm stuck here:

















i wish this were me on the beach...
















but instead, this is me at the office:














i wish i were with somebody who's in hawaii right now...

but instead, i'm with chocolate: