Wednesday, March 30, 2005


Dear Erika's Mom,

I'm writings in regard to the fact that it's almost April, and snowing, and windy, and cold.

This is the time of year when birds chirp, rabbits frolic, and bees buzz. Flowers spring up with delight while relaxing beneath the warm sun. BYU students joyfully fall in love and plan their April/May weddings. The aroma of fresh, mountain air permeates the air, and all thoughts of the harsh Utah winter fade.

All these things have yet to happen. This makes me angry, and depressed, and COLD!

So, if you wouldn't mind, please get out of the Northern Hemisphere so that the planet's axis will tip TOWARD the sun and not AWAY from the sun.

With regards,

Frozen Nama

Wednesday, March 23, 2005


Why IS it that you get compliments on days you look your worst? Erika asked the question, and I ask again. Now, I don't have an answer or anything, but this topic has been on my mind due to an incident that makes me ask this question.

Set up: Nama had only slept 4 hours the night before, had showered and dressed herself, and ran out the door to get to class when she ran into her friend, her token gay guy (TGG), she had not seen in a while. Conversation ensued, when TGG interrupted Nama...

TGG: Can I interject something?

Nama: Sure?

TGG: You look BEAUTIFUL today!

Nama: (laughing) Yeah, sure, especially after 4 hours of sleep and the complete lack of getting read that happened this morning.

TGG: No, I'm serious. You look tired as hell, but you look incredibly beautiful today.

Nama: (pause) Where can I find a straight man like you?

TGG: (laughing) Don't worry. I'm looking for one to. Without the straight part.

Aaaaaaand scene.

Again, why? Should I ALWAYS get 4 hours of sleep and simply run out of the house without completely getting ready? Would I be married by now if I had learned this before and put it into practice? THIS is the quintessential existential dilemma.

Wednesday, March 16, 2005

Best friends are great because...

I've been inspired lately by subject matters of other blogs, and the award this week goes to Jay.

I too have a best friend. Her name is Jessica. We've known each other since elementary school, and, excluding the few "break-ups" in middle school, we've been like two peas in a pod for over 10 years. She's the only friend from my childhood that I keep in touch with on a regular basis, and even if we do go for a couple of months or so without talking to each other, it's almost as if we never skipped a beat. We have a mass variety of inside jokes. WOOOO inside jokes! WOOOO!! And this, along with a billion other reasons, is why I love her and consider her to be the closest, most dear and understanding friend I could ask for.

Whoa, whoa! Sorry, getting a little sappy back there. Here's another reason why I love Jessica: there's ALWAYS so much drama in her life, and I get a kick out of it every time she talks to me about it. It's like I'm sitting there with a bowl of popcorn watching her every move and laughing hysterically at her pain.

Case in point: Jessica found herself in a Pride & Prejudice situation at the beginning of the year. There was a guy she knew and was interested in who was sweet, loving, a little off, but nice. She then met another guy, who was a little rude, stand-offish, fun, but hateful. She liked both of these men, but did not know which one to choose. The first seemed promising, but didn't feel right. The second was downright mean at times, but she found herself strangely attracted to him. So there I sat, and watched, giving her advice along the way, but mainly being entertained. So, I call her today to get updated and...she's in love!!! As it turns out, the first assumingly sweet guy was really Wickham and the second grew on her and, in her own words, "gets better and better every day".

She found her Darcy, and this makes me so happy to see this movie...errr, situation...end so happy!! The best part was how she told him that she loved him. She was worried and scared and told him that she needed to tell him something, but just couldn't bring herself to tell him. Her got totally freaked out and was about to start hyperventilating, thinking something was terribly wrong. She then just blurted it out, "I love you!" He then starting breathing again and said, "Well, I love you too!" And all was happy. Happy, happy, happy. Who needs the A&E Pride & Prejudice when I have Jessica.

Love you, toots!

Tuesday, March 08, 2005

and Choas ensues

I've been comtemplative and confused of late.

Echoing Erika's blog, I just don't know what to do with my life. I graduate in December, and have a million different paths I can choose. Combined with the kick-me-in-my-pants semester I've been having, I just feel like I'm under a constant state of stress and worry, though I'm careful not to get myself too overworked.

I keep telling myself that when I eventually get through this semester alive, I'll be in Italy, doing what I love. Yet, when I get home from Italy, I'll be faced with a fresh-of-the-mission "friend" who I'm sure, the more I think about it, I will have to let go of. Desires and feelings to serve a mission have been pressed upon my mind, as well. Graduate school is a viable and desirable option. I want to be a wife and a mother. I want to be a missionary. I want to be a physical anthropologist and study dead people, because SOMEBODY needs to be their friends, and that somebody is me!

I feel as if I have to choose between cheesecake, German chocolate cake, and a Symphony bar for desert...there's no good/right answer and they're all so good! *drroooolllll*

I think that perhaps my feelings at this time would best be described in the words of the wise Bob Dylan himself:

You've gone to the finest school all right, Miss Lonely But you know you only used to get juiced in it And nobody has ever taught you how to live on the street And now you find out you're gonna have to get used to it...

You used to be so amused at Napoleon in rags and the language that he used Go to him now, he calls you, you can't refuse When you got nothing, you got nothing to lose You're invisible now, you got no secrets to conceal.

How does it feel How does it feel To be on your own With no direction home Like a complete unknown Like a rolling stone?

hmph. Maybe I just need to do more yoga. Funny that the only time I have felt completely relaxed and lack all of this stress and can just mentally drift away is when I'm doing yoga. Or maybe I need more chocolate. That tends to solve problems, but only when I'm pre-menstral. Dah! Maybe I should just curl up with my Bob Briar mummy book, read about dead people, and hide from the world that's been creeping up on me. And do yoga. And dance. Because, after all...

Nothing left for me to do but DANCE off these bad times I'm going through just DANCE!
Got canned heat in my heals tonight, baby!

You know this boogie is for real,
got so much canned heat in my heels yeah
Gonna DANCE, gonna DANCE my blues away tonight

Nothing left for me to do but DANCE off these bad times I'm going through just DANCE!
Got canned heat in my heals tonight, baby!

Thank you Napoleon Dynamite for your inspiring dance moves.